Saturday, January 4, 2020

Now

Now is the moment we are in, the only real ‘time’ that truly exists or matters. Yesterday is but a memory and tomorrow is a vision. It is all a dream that often seems like a nightmare. This is life, it is inevitable and unavoidable if we are to grow.

As difficult as it is, as much concentration as it seems to take initially, learning to let go of our yesterdays as an emotional imprint will be the key to our successful, inspired tomorrows. Knowledge and learning are necessary for our mental growth and it is often tricky to discern between that which should be kept and that which should be discarded.

It is also difficult to understand if we are truly letting go of painful or unpleasant memories or simply locking them away inside an emotional coffin that never can be buried. At 60, I can truly say I have evolved a lot and that I may have had several of those coffins in my cemetery of dark nights. It has been an arduous task to open them and view those skeletons in the light of day. What has been most necessary for me to really release the emotional attachment to painful memories has been to fully acknowledge them. Sometimes it involves confronting others who were involved which, to them, appears like you are dredging up the past or looking for retribution when, in truth, the burden has been like a ball and chain around your sense of well being since the event happened.

The thing is, you cannot do this with any expectation about resolution, although it often happens due to the passage of time and personal growth. Don’t be surprised if your confession is met with shock or disbelief that there was ever a problem or because the incident was forgotten. This is being done for your own release and healing of the wound that may be holding you back.

Lastly, it isn’t always only painful memories that need to be released. Often a really good memory, such as a former friendship or relationship, even a great meal, can interfere with what is happening in your now. A new friend or partner who hears constantly about the past perfection you shared with another may seem like a monumental wall to climb in reaching that same state with you.

In my current now, I am trying to create emotional/mental memory books. They have categories and titles in my heart. Those events that occur which require me to learn something go into a mental segment called Experience. The ones that are triggers which bring me back to pain without purpose are being put into imaginary balloons, tied with ribbon and allowed to drift away from my soul. Those that inspire or lift me up in difficult moments go into my Heart file.

Do I still have recurring issues? Of course. One cannot live fully without pain and baggage. At least now my perspective is shifted so that I can keep myself together. I feel more in control of me, which, after all, is the only thing any of us can control.

This is the main reason I love photography. It takes a moment and freezes it for me. I can look at one photo on different days and recall the moment I took it and the feelings I had, or I can view it from an entirely new perspective. That is how life and relationships are. As humans living shared lives, we share the same moments and often the same experiences, but our perspectives and perceptions can be vastly different regarding them.

Be true to yourself with respect to the perspectives of others. There is love in all things.



Can anyone imagine how this moment made me feel? How does it make you feel? Any thoughts? I’d love to hear them. 
Happy #free48 everyone! Make every moment memorable. 

12 comments:

  1. "the burden has been like a ball and chain around your sense of well being since the event happened"

    Oh, how true these words are for at least two experiences in my life. Truly a ball and chain. However, I've worked to let go of them as much as possible (because you never completely forget) and move on with a life filled with people who love, laugh and take me for what I am. This is a wonderful post, Cheryl, and I wish a joyous, loving and happy journey down the road of whatever life brings.

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  2. healing is always good no matter what or when the injury.

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  3. I want to know if these are physical "emotional/mental memory books", or is this a place in your mind? Interesting idea. I think my small journals are just that.

    And capturing images that evoke memories -- same with sketching. It makes that time come alive for me.

    Being here now (RIP Ram Dass) is a difficult thing to be...

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    1. I feel it works mentally, physically or spiritually, whatever you need or can do. I journal at times but use meditative methods at others. I also believe that some interactions aren’t possible for many reasons so an imaginary conversation or something in your mind is good, as long as a person expresses themselves honestly and is willing to release the pain. I love your art and can feel your wmotions in it, Kate.

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  4. I was able top get this to show up in my WP Reader (which I am trying to clean up) but I have to visit in order to comment. That's OK, it's one click from the reader to visit the post.

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    1. Thanks for letting me know, Dan. I’m relieved it isn’t too much trouble.

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  5. Wow! There is great wisdom in this post. I need to listen.

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    1. I am trying to learn from my mis steps and live a healthier life beginning within, Pam. Everyone has their own path to follow. You have led a tremendously rich life and many more miles to go! 😀

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  6. It resonates with me! Happy New 2020

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  7. Hi Lara! I am hoping for a new and improved year in spite of the looming agenda. Hugs, my friend.

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I love hearing your thoughts!