Life’s Like This/Complicated

One minute you feel caged in, unable to shine..

The next, you’re riding on air! 

Don’t give up, don’t give in. 

Just wait a minute, 

feel yourself in it

and start all 

over again 

 

Don’t Give Up

 My blogging friend Pam managed to put into words through her poem today what I have been feeling. The past year has been excruciatingly painful, trying, challenging and disappointing in so many ways. She, like myself, has tried to cling to the positive, to true hope and faith in the tenacity of living because this is what determined humans do. 

I can’t speak for anyone else, but the physical and emotional trials alone don’t knock me off my feet. It is when my creative well runs dry that true depression comes knocking at my door. When I can’t find the words or sketch an image I feel like I am hanging over a great abyss with no hope but to plunge into the depths. 

While we did ‘escape’ to paradise here in Panama, it has been enjoyable only in bits and pieces due to an emergent health issue that came up for my husband. I know he came close to death at least once during all of this and I have never felt as alone as I did in the moment I realized I had to make decisions to help him. He is normally the leader, making plans and executing the details while I am consultant and laborer. Couple this with being in a foreign country where I am minimally able to speak the language while most of the medical people I had to work with spoke minimal to no English; and the pressure was nearly debilitating. 

My father, who passed away tragically and unnecessarily just four months ago, always taught me to pick myself up and dust myself off in the hard times. He told me to face the unknown with courage and without fear. It is an easier thing for a child to do when facing a vaccination than when facing life’s more daunting challenges. Still, I carry his credo with me and always plug forward, knowing things will work out somehow.  

What pulls me through the worst of times is to do something for others. People say to pamper myself, take a hot bath or buy something special; but what cheers me most of all is to give someone else a reason to smile. Doing things that bring joy to others really makes my heart glad. 

Soooo...I pulled out the art supplies I brought with me and, although the gorgeous nature just couldn’t inspire me to represent it on the page, our landlord’s youngest child was to be my inspiration. This family is such a joy to be around and their young daughter has the vibrance of a dozen children. She is vivacious, challenging, tireless, tenacious and fearless. I expect she will go far in life and I wanted her to have a remembrance of herself from someone who viewed her from the distance beyond family. 

This is Luna.

It took a few days to finish and is just my simple work, but creating this was a joy. Thank you Luna! 

Meanwhile, we ended up in town for another medical visit and soon the drizzling began while the sun shone brightly, so I instinctively looked back over my shoulder and there it was! 

The promise 

There is a phenomenon here in Boquete in the mountains known as the Bajareque. When the misting showers come and the sun shines there is a rainbow effect that is magnificent. I have yet to see the fully brilliant version that covers a valley but am quite content to be able to see the ones I have. 

As Josh says, 

“Don’t give up, because You. Are. Loved.”

Honesty #SoCS

 

Honesty...

This post brought to you for Linda Hill’s #SoCS Prompt. Please visit her blog for more posts and great prompts. 

The Morning After

 This one seems appropriate to me right now. 

There’s got to be a morning after

if we can hold on through the night.

We have a chance to find the sunshine,

let’s keep on looking for the light. 

It’s not too late

we should be giving

only with love can we climb..

It’s not too late

not while we’re living,

let’s put our hands out in time.

Oh can’t you see the morning after.

We’re moving closer to the shore.

I know we’ll be there by tomorrow

and we’ll escape the darkness,

we won’t be searching anymore....

I chose this version of her live performance during the 1988 MD telethon because I always admired Jerry Lewis and his efforts to support the Muscular Dystrophy Foundation. I volunteered at several locations as a teenager to man phones, make and fetch coffee and anything else that needed to be done.

We need to get back to the busyness of life, of caring and sharing what is important, of lifting one another up rather than constantly tearing each other down. The world needs to reflect the inner beauty of her inhabitants, not the pale imitation that Narcissa has mesmerized so many with. 

I must believe there will be a morning after that is bright with confident hope, deep appreciation and fresh gratitude. 

Humble

 

Before God’s creation

I am humble,

knowing we are but grains of 

sand along the shores of time-

and standing alone are

 nearly invisible.

Together we can form 

mountains, reaching to

the heavens as we lift

each other up,

offering a steady shoulder

when needed and accepting

a foothold when we falter

ourselves. 

Nothing truly great is

ever accomplished alone,

nothing in creation can be known

without another. 

Community, cohesion, cooperation,

appreciation, admiration, aspiration

to be all that we 

dream.

Together.

Humble.

CKP copyright 2020

Never Give Up

This simple video, made by my grandson’s mother some time ago, is more relevant now than the first time I heard it. In spite of the grim news we hear, the unsettling changes in our day to day lives and the frightening uncertainties that loom on the horizon, we must remain focused on what we want to manifest in our world. When you remove the material aspect of what we consider valuable, what is left is our physical and mental health. It is imperative to our physical well being that we have a strong mental state. Sometimes all we have is the certainty that our souls will live on, that our will to survive is our greatest defense. Children have simple faith, based on the lack of experiences they have gone through. They carry the promise of eternity in their hearts which they share freely. 

It is time to return to that simple faith and understanding, to be diligent and wise in our choices and to share love in every moment. Love and fear are at war, not from any outside source, but from within the heart of humanity. 

In the movie The Day the Earth Stood Still, the final scenes find our hero pleading with an alien omniscient entity for mercy and to give  humankind one more chance. If only we had such a tangible force to reckon with. Instead we have an evolving, unpredictable alien virus that can neither be reasoned with or held at bay unless we put aside our own agendas and work for the good of the whole. 

Then, perhaps, Bob Marley’s words will not have been shared in vain. I think he would be proud of Noah’s rendition. 

“This is my message to you.hoo.hoo....”

Stay well, my friends. 🤗💕